1. |
Intro
00:16
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hello
isn't this a beautiful day?
daisy, daisy
up with the morning dew
and now it's time
to rise and shine
as i witness the day
for you
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2. |
Smoke And Barlight
05:00
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From where I am standing
You seem pretty lonely
Like you are still missing somebody
And from the look of things
I know you need someone to love you
Someone to love you
And I'm certain I could do that
But you are so cold and so far away
When you are laying beside me
And I know what it means when you roll away
You're not the only one who's hiding
I look for you in the darkest places
I follow you through smoke and barlight
I search for you until i am frozen
choking on words i wish i had spoken
I wish I had spoken
But I follow you all through the night and sometimes, sometimes
When I find you there's nothing left over
I wish that you wanted me like you still want him
I guess I'm waiting
Waiting for joe to be finished with you so that I can begin
But I will not hold my breath
I've decided to hold you instead
While I watch you pass yourself around the block again
And wonder if I'm just another one of them
And you may fight it until you're dead inside
But I'll still be holding onto you for dear life
Because I recognize love when it stares me down at night
And from where I am standing
You seem pretty lonely
Like you are still missing somebody
And from the look of things
I know you need someone to love you
Someone to love you
And I follow you all through the night and sometimes, sometimes
When I find you there's nothing left over...
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3. |
Panic
03:52
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There is panic in my soul tonight
Because there is nothing behind your eyes
Telling me you are still in love with me
And so it turns out that you were always right
To predict how this will be ending
But I was never listening
I was blinded by the light of disillusionment
I was always forgetting
That I was not allowed to hold you so close
Until you turned out the light
I was to wait until you were sleeping
And that was all that you could give me
I knew you had to be awake sometimes
And were just too afraid to stop pretending
That this was not the safest place you had ever been
And I keep wishing that you would reach out and touch me
Reciprocate some of the safety
But I could not get you to love me
You could not be awakened
And you will never be awake
You will never be awake
But I keep wishing
Said I keep wishing...
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4. |
Meat
04:40
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If you need someone to pray for
Get down on your knees and ask your god to forgive you
For what you have done to me
This mistake you have made
But don't you dare mention my name
Don't you dare pray for me
You little shit
I can barely stomache the thought of it
Because my mind is full of black feeling and angry thought
Said my mind is full of black feeling
I'm wishing terror for the two of you
Hoping curses for you and your family
Like maybe you will both catch herpes from a toilet seat
Or choke on one another's hood fucking river meat
That god might forsake you
Leave you lonely as I am
Find More lyrics at www.sweetslyrics.com
That your children will have fins, gills and webbed feet
I know it sounds silly but it's keeping me smiling
To visualize vindication´
Following my unfortunate victimization
I don't feel any sense of liberation
So if you need justification to put your mind at ease
Don't look to me
Said don't fucking look to me
I don't think jesus would've fucked me over so thoroughly
You're no shining example of christianity
May you never sleep through the night again knowing that
May you never find peace in your cold bed
May you double over and die from the pain of it
When you decide it's time to miss me...
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5. |
The Mothership
05:12
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I am holding myself
Together with duct tape
Unloading myself upon you
Like the mothership
Having finally blown the
Candy coating over my
Nuclear family to bits
And things are exploding
In our faces
These fires have really been
Burning us lately
I am hoping for midnight
In a half a minute
And wishing for my animosity
To leave my body
And give me some privacy
Who am I
To bring you along
For this ride
Have you been
Dying inside?
Like I have
Or maybe you are
As confused as I am
And maybe the flame
Is as hot for you
As it is for me
But I find that hard to believe
When you are fucking crazy
I am holding myself
Together with duct tape
And wishing I could
Tie myself down with
A marijuana cigarette
How many nights
Will I be plagued
With this circular thinking
In the darkness?
I lost count
About two years
After the baby died
I know my mother
Will never stop crying
And she probably
Never will forgive me for
Being alive
Yeah, it probably
Should have been me who died
But I just keep on living and living
And living and living
When you are fucking crazy
You are fucking crazy
Who am I
To bring you
Along for this ride
Have you been
Dying inside
Like I have?
Or maybe you are
As confused as I am
And maybe the flame
Is as hot for you
As it is for me
But I find that hard to believe
It's hard for me to believe
When you are fucking crazy
You are fucking crazy
And things are exploding in our faces
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6. |
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I have watched you waste your love on gutter trash
I have stood by you while your heart was breaking in half
And I have held your warm body next to mine while you were sleeping
I have watched you spread yourself too thin while you were awake
And now the moonlight is burning your glory
And now I can see just where you want me to stay
Try as I might to convince myself otherwise
Try as I might to convince myself otherwise
I have eyes for you only
And I am watching you waste your frustration on these small people
I am wanting you to notice who's never hurt you
And I am
and I am wishing you were in a better space in your head
And I am wishing you away for a second
Try as I might to convince myself otherwise
Try as I might to convince myself otherwise
I have eyes for you only
And now your guilt about this has burnt my insides to the point of boiling
And now I can see just how small our love can be
Try as I might to convince you otherwise
Try as I might to convince you otherwise
I have eyes for you only
And now the moonlight is burning your glory
And now I can see just where you want me to stay
Try as I might to convince myself otherwise
Try as I might to convince myself otherwise
I have eyes for you only...
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7. |
Here We Go Again
05:44
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Here we go again
I am sucked back in like no time has passed at all
And I have no idea where to draw the line with you
I'm running out of chalk
I am always chasing a dream that you might stand still with me
And watch all the other boy's pass out of your life and into the past
But this clarity would never dare last
And all my senses fail me at the sound of your voice
There's no time that could heal that
So I am left with a choice
Is it worse to be hurting than to be in pain from the missing?
God knows you're no catch
But it's you who has caught me
And all my senses fail me at the sound of your voice
There's no time that could heal that
But here we go again
I am sucked back in like no time has passes at all
And I have no idea where to draw the line with you
I'm running out of chalk
And all my senses fail me at the sound of your voice
But here we go again...
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8. |
The End Of The Scene
04:55
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I noticed you first when I came into the party
And I wanna know if you are here with somebody
And if you are not would you like to be here with me
Because I have never talked like this with anybody
And that is really amazing because
God knows that before I turned fifteen I fucked everybody
What's that?
Oh, I see
What a pity
What a terrible shame
And disappointment for me
I will not allow myself to be surprised
Because this is the thing that I have come to realize
There are no kind faces
There are no kind faces
No kind faces
I cannot change anything or anybody
I can only force them to see what they are missing
I tell this to myself until I am blue in the face
And then we walk a pale blue mile
To the end of the scene
Remarking on the distance of our journey
And bathing ourselves in the mystery
Of what could happen if we were to let it
But I do not hate myself enough to ask
I do not hate myself enough to ask
There are no kind faces
No kind faces
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9. |
You Think Like A Man
04:31
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If I am gone tonight
I am gone forever
If I walk tonight I will not look back
And you won't even notice I have gone
Until there is nothing to grab onto
When there is nothing but slim pickings
And you think like a man
And you think like a man
I hope that you find God where you are looking
But I have to say that I have already been to those places
And God is not hiding
He is already dead
There's no love to find
No love to swim in
So you will find yourself drowning
Sinking in the sea of men that you have created
I am but one of them
I am but one of them
And I am too tired to keep floating
So I grab a straw, mirror and a razor blade
And make my way to the exit
And make my way to the exit
But I love myself enough to ask that you hold my place on your list of men
Maybe even put me in the top ten
And know that all that was is nothing
I said all that was is nothing
And it's like I said
If I am gone tonight
I am gone forever
If I walk tonight I will not look back...
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10. |
Menthol
04:22
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you say "n-----s only smoke them menthol cigarettes"
and i say "n----r ain't a word i like to say"
like "i have still got things to find in dirty restaurants"
tell me why you will not turn and walk away
From me
The life we have built
The pain you've caused
And the child
Who might have been
If it weren't for you
If it weren't for you
It wasn't your hand you used
To wipe away my innocence
With nothing left to say
Or to disguise
Had I known I could not run from you
I would not have tried
In time
I could forgive you
Or maybe not
I would like to say "I love you"
But I do not
I do not
If satan scared me half as bad as you
These past few weeks
I'd already have gone running back to god
I have tried my best
I am sorry if I failed you just like him
Oh my god
I feel the heat
On my skin
And this fucking blood
From my head
Is burning my eyes
It's burning my eyes
But I will not cry
I will not cry
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11. |
Licking The Walls
03:25
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You know me
I've got diamonds on the ceiling
And demons in my head
So get the hell out of my apartment
Your drunk ass needs to get the hell out of my face
And take your shit with you
I'm full up on space
You need to stay the fuck out of my way
'Cuz you know me
I am licking the walls and bouncing
Bouncing
So get the hell on with what you are saying
You make no sense to me
So get the fuck out of my face
And take your poison with you
I've got my own poison to breathe
And I am ripping
Ripping
So get the hell out of my apartment
And take your shit with you
I've had enough for my life
And you leave me your keys
You piece of shit
Those keys are staying here with me
They're staying
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12. |
Digging
03:53
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Digging through Jennifer's garbage
Looking for cigarette butts
I am going to smoke
Every last one of them
With you laying awake
Shake your head all you want
I did not ask for your permission
It was given to me
It was given to me
You are shrinking me
You are weakening my spirit
I was so right to expect this
I was so right
I think I could have loved you forever
Wipe the black from my eyes
Pick myself up off this planet
And notice how different I am
Now I wait for my emotions to drain
And then for my eyes
I am waiting for you
To come back to your senses
But I am wasting my time
Putting my heart into boxes
I am taping you shut
All the power of jesus
Wouldn't let me forget
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13. |
Like Clockwork
04:06
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The sunlight is going down like clockwork this evening
Just as it came into our lives this morning
And we are left looking at each other through cold eyes
And I know you have to see me
The way that I can see you sometimes
What I would give to believe that
What I would give to believe that
And I can feel my strength
I can feel it
I can feel my strength
Beginning to exit
Through the hole in my stomach lining
Stepping over my feelings
And explosions
And bombs that have been
Sorely mistreated
But left, unexploded
But left unexploded
And I can make you cum
But you will not go away from my thoughts
And then
And then
I can feel myself falling down over you
Like clockwork
And I wonder how long I can hold my breath
And I wonder why I am even doing this to myself
When what I want to be doing is anything but
When what you need me to be wanting is anything but
Am I making you crazy again this evening
Just like I did when we were first waking up this morning
It's taken all of my strength to try and
Mask what's been burning
You're officially under my skin
My friend
And there is no fucking calamine
For this bullshit
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14. |
Pills With Smiling Faces
04:49
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big cock motherfucker
big cock motherfucker
big cock motherfucker
big cock motherfucker
And now, suddenly I can feel this
I can taste your not wanting me
I can feel your cold look burning a hole in my skin
Without having to see it
My stomach's erupting with violence
My stomach's erupting with violence
And at a time like this it's hard to be silent
It's hard to keep quiet
I am feeling the love pass from my body
I am flushing two years down the toilet
I am feeling the love pass from my body
I am flushing two years down the toilet
This bed is so cold without you in it
This bed is stone cold and silent
And at times like this it's hard to be quiet
At times like this I wish I were violent
All I really wanna do is peel that off the ceiling
It's hard enough to wake up during wintertime
Without having to see it
I never cared much for the gray sky
Never pictured myself alone
For the rest of my life
I need pills with smiling faces
I need pills with smiling faces
'Cuz at a time like this
I just want to take them
And take them and take them
This bed is so cold without you in it
This bed is stone cold and silent
And at times like this I wish I could be quiet
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15. |
Still Pretending
04:17
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These are my staying awake nights
Keeping myself entertained nights
Making you out to be insane
With trying not to fight
I am alone in this restlessness
I am coping with my busy life
Not exposed to any true advice
With a slippery hand
In my mirror there is no hiding from this
In my mirror I am still pretending
That it is before my awakening
That it is before my awakening
So I am crying over nothing tonight
You have been keeping me awake tonight
Wish I could turn off your bright eyes
Without causing a flash of light
In my mirror there is no denying this
In my mirror there is no hiding from this
I am truly terrified
And still
I am pretending it's before my awakening
That it is before my awakening
Before my awakening
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16. |
Another Day's End
05:16
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It's another day's end
And I think it's a crying shame
One would think that
The blow might have killed me by now
But who's to say
Jesus has forced me
To forgive
But I cannot forget
That I am destruction
I am reckless abandon
Always running from everything
And nothing at the same time
Usually too high to notice you passing me by
Because I have promises
I have photographs
Because I am nothing
I am skin and bones and chicken shit
And you can see that
I can see it reflecting in your eyes
So I fold it up and put it in my back pocket
And then fuck you anyway
It's funny how quickly I forget
What my pocket has to say
When my pants are around my ankles
And jesus has forced me
To forgive
But I cannot forget
That I am destruction
I am reckless abandon
And jesus has forced me
To forgive
But that doesn't change the fact that
I have promises
I have photographs
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17. |
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So it's been
Nineteen hours since
I lost hold of my surroundings
I'm piecing them together as we speak
I'm trying to overlook
The snap! crackle! popping! of the LSD
Does this mean you don't want to see me
On the inside
'Cuz I've no chance to survive
In this safe place
This safe place
Don't you wish we were on our way
To outer space
What are the rest of my kind
Doing with their days
Frying their balls off
With jill in the morning
I am sizzling away
What is left of my brain
And watching as it passes
Still trying to overlook
The snap! crackle! popping! of the LSD
Does this mean you don't want to see me
On the inside
'Cuz I've no chance to survive
In this safe place
This safe place
I fucking wish we were on our way
To outer space
Don't you wish we were on our way
To outer space?
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Logan Lynn Portland, Oregon
New Money is out now on Kill Rock Stars! Pick up your copy on vinyl, CD + digital everywhere music is streamed and sold.
Logan Lynn recommends:
I produced this charity record. 36 bands, 45 songs, 15 bucks. 100% of album sales goes to benefit programs of Q Center which operates the LGBTQ Community Center & the queer youth center in Portland.
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